velocidarling:

Velocidarling: “As portrayed by the BBC’s Sherlock, Sherlock and John have an abusive relationship.”

goldenheartedrose:

stogucheme:

jayoublie:

Recommended reading for all Sherlock fans.

Holy crap. (Don’t watch Sherlock, so I can’t confirm it, but if the information is accurate…wow.)

I’ve very iffy on this.  I think that a lot of the time, neurodivergents tend to be viewed as abusive, but if that is the case, they are abusive to EVERYONE.  Sherlock is clearly neurodivergent, even in ACD’s depiction of him.  I’m not going to put a specific label on him, because that’s not the point. 

Understanding and accepting social interaction is not something I can do well.  It’s also something that in many cases, Sherlock has a problem with as well.  Saying things that are facts without having someone to help me realize that they were just freaking RUDE has often been a problem for me.  Somehow I doubt that Sherlock has ever had that; notice in “The Reichenbach Fall” how John coaches him on how to act in certain situations, to explain sarcasm, to remind him to say thank you, to coach him on how to behave in court (not that Sherlock listens in that case).  I don’t doubt that a lot of this is DIRECTLY because of what he said to Molly at the Christmas party, and even in that case, he was mean, absolutely.  He was also very blunt and direct, and you know what? He felt guilty.  He felt terrible for what he had said, of course, because he realized it was for him.  

The fandom pretty much sucks when it comes to Anderson and Donovan, so I don’t even see a point in touching on those two.  I take the interaction between the three of them (Anderson, Donovan and Sherlock) to be pretty much just throwing insults back and forth. 

I do see him drugging John, locking John into the lab in HOUNDS to be terribly problematic.  I’m not okay with non-consensual anything.  I’m not okay with the experimentation.  It is an issue, and it’s not an issue that’s ever discussed on screen, and that is what makes it an issue.  Sherlock should have been corrected on that way harsher than he was.  I hope that the writers make a way for that to happen in the future.  

My thoughts are kind of scattered today.  I am having this battle of agree/disagree with this post.  Perhaps I’ll be better able to clarify tomorrow.

Hey, I totally respect what you’re saying about the stigmatization of autistic/neurodivergent people in media.

I actually set aside the question of whether or not Sherlock is on the autistic spectrum or neurodivergent because whether he is or isn’t — he’s still responsible for not abusing people.  The behaviors I outlined which are all canonical are in fact abusive behaviors, period.  The same thing applies to me, for example, with my PTSD.  Just because somebody accidentally triggers me does not mean I get to lash out at them, degrade them or dehumanize them.  NOT ON.  Doesn’t matter that it relates to a disease I have (that’s how I conceptualize it right now, not trying to foist that on anyone else).  You are still accountable to yourself and others.  Edit for clarity: I am not trying to say being on the autistic spectrum constitutes a disease.  The similarity lies in the general … I mean, you don’t choose to be on the autistic spectrum; nor do you choose to get PTSD.  They’re “traits” that you have and work around since larger society is less than accommodating, is the comparison I’m drawing.

Also, he does not “be mean” to Molly; he regularly emotionally and verbally abuses her.  He manipulates her feelings, consistently generates deep feelings of insecurity and worthlessness in her, bullies her — those behaviors, when repeated, are abuse.  And one kiss doesn’t fix the problem, for me, nor does one instance of acknowledging her worth to use her again.

I also do agree Sherlock is generally abusive to everyone and at the very least incredibly self-serving (I think of his relationship with Mrs. Hudson here — she seems the least affected by his direct fuckery, but he certainly uses her … she undergoes some kind of physical/emotional intimidation by the CIA thugs to protect his possessions).

I saw someone reblog my original post saying they didn’t want to watch Sherlock ever again.

Watch it.  Please.  Engage with it.  Talk about it.  Do some research on abuse culture and abuse.  Think about all the other television shows that feed off of that poison.

I’m having a lot of issues with what goldenheartedrose is saying and I’m not feeling up to articulating them, really, but:

One of my worst fears is that I’ll lose touch with reality in some way, and do shitty things to people, and no one will tell me because they’ll just think “oh well she’s crazy”.

So I have a really hard time reading responses to Sherlock’s obvious abusiveness that run along the lines of “well but he’s neurodivergent so it’s problematic to call his behavior abusive, and anyway he clearly feels bad about it sometimes!”

I’m wary & tired of people who only seem to bring up stigma against neurodivergence when it means derailing conversations about/justifying abuse and other shitty things. Not that goldenheartedrose is doing that, per say, but IN GENERAL I see it happen a lot and it grates on me.

(Also I’m tired of how Sherlock’s neurodivergence always gets brought up, while John’s always seems to be glossed over. But yeah.)